Training to be Soldier

So another chapter of my life comes to a close.. BMT has been an interesting journey. I don’t have a very good memory so i am trying to remember everything that has happened especially my last day in 3rd coy Samurai. The march was crazy, my feet and body has never felt so sore ever.. Despite the physical and mental exhaustion there were many things i loved about the march. The sky was inviting, granting a clear night with the moon shining brightly throughout the march. The night was filled with stars too. Always loved the night.. But i guess the thing that i loved most was getting to march it with my friends and Kenneth. We never got the chance to talk deep during BMT even though we shared the same bunk, so marching and talking for over 9 hours was more than enough to compensate for that. The other part that impress heavily on my mind was during the re-entry of the Graduation Parade. Seeing the commanders tear up because they are so proud of us and that they were gonna miss us made many others tear up as well. At that moment i really felt the camaraderie that was formed the last 4 months. BMT has impacted me in many ways and i don’t want to ever forget the experiences and the friends that i have met.

SAMURAI PLATOON 1!

Becoming Like An Old Man

Its been too long since i last post. Seems like a lot has happened. From incidents like OCS/SCS, Signing on with the Navy, Having a new ministry next year and countless of small but significant events(not all army related). I don’t like to say this but i think that i grown up quite a fair bit. Honestly army helped me mature a lot.

Its New Year’s Eve and i am at home. Maybe its an old person thing where New Year isn’t that big of a deal anymore or it could be because i am sick and piled with more than 5 different sickness. Its the biggest combo of illness i have ever had. The thing that surprised me the most was how willing i was to stay home and rest rather than go for WatchNight service which is totally awesome! This growing up thing makes me feel uncomfortable. Never liked growing up. Never liked making decisions base on need instead of want. But seems like it just happens.. Which scares me because what if many changes in me just ‘happens’ and i do not stop to consider if its good for me or not but just let it be because of the circumstances and the influences that people have on me? Sigh… See this is what growing up is like. Got to be watchful and alert all the time.. Actually that’s how a Christian should be too. Ahhhh conviction of the Holy Spirit. Can’t run away from such things.. If you are lost, do not worry. Its just unfiltered thoughts~

Okay thats about it.. PEACE!

A thought dropped and caused a ripple effect..

Got a short post..

Was at a Dance Min Xmas party just now. Only dance min can think of celebrating xmas in november, crazy awesome bunch of people!

Anyway took a cab home and we ended up on the topic of religion. He said something that caught my attention. Oh btw, the whole convo was in chinese and i actually understood it.. He said ‘What’s the point of believing and going to temple/church if it doesn’t transform your life. There must be something about it that you can gain from, something that can’t be found elsewhere.’ The most interesting part is that he is a buddhist. Anyway i was wondering if the youth in R-AGE are transformed or if they have gain anything.. or if i am transformed either..

Other than this, i got fieldcamp this week. Only get to book out in 2 weeks time.. Really scare about fieldcamp. Please keep me in prayer! thanks(:

The Voyager of Beliefs

Didn’t know FM Static was christian, awesome song.. awesome album..

Just needed to rant..

Things haven’t been at its best lately.. Wait, who am i kidding.. Going out with people that you enjoy being around and living 5 days a week without needing to think of what to wear/eat/do is pretty much the life my anti-mel loves. My melancholic side has been suppressed a lot lately. But with each passing weekend it gets stronger and stronger.. I like going with the flow, just living life without having to worry about anything or thinking about what is good or bad/right or wrong (i think those are about the same meaning..) In short, living like a zombie..

I am not saying that army is the place i WANT to be, it’s just not that bad of a place overall. Of course being able to sit in front of the television and laptop, eat non-stop and meet friends are better alternatives. Anywho, despite all this.. I feel an emptiness from time to time, wondering if there is more meaning to life. That is when the melancholic side in me claws at the door eager to be unleashed.. When that happens..

I sit facing a screen, typing this..

Why Must We Serve~

After posting the previous entry i realized that i haven’t blogged for a month. I haven’t blogged about my new found army life. I don’t really know what to post about army.. There are many different aspects of army that i reflected and experienced, so i guess i will just blog about whatever comes to mind. Got to watch what i say about army though, don’t want to be caught leaking any information..

During the 2 weeks confinement, the one thing that i really felt deprived of was MUSIC! I didn’t bring my mp3 in so for 17 days the only songs i heard were army songs. And it plays in my head every night before i sleep. It.Was.Horrible! 17days is a long time, you will change to adapt. Some changes are needed, some changes are intentional, some changes are subtle. Subtle changes scares me because the only time you realized there is a change is when you have already changed. So profound right? Sometimes subtle changes can be for the worse and it happens. Like after being exposed to vulgarity and no filtering for 17 days, i actually caught myself swearing. So i am trying my best to be guarded now but it is not that bad because i am only in camp 5 days a week.

I entered army looking at it as a different stage of my life, i didn’t dread it neither did i embrace it. All in all it is a new experience and with each new experiences comes new things to be learn. A change in lifestyle really opens your eyes to new perspectives, allowing you to see things in a clearer light.

Okay i am super tired now, i can’t think anymore so i will leave this post as it is. I am not sure if people still comes here after a month of 0 posts.. Anyway for those of you who cares how i am doing, let me assure you that army isn’t bringing me down.. Maybe not yet.. But for now i am learning a lot and i think it is actually doing me some good.

Have a good week ahead(:

 

Falling Away From God

I met Jolene today and we came to this topic about walking away from God. I can’t understand how people who have experienced God can walk away from God. It is like walking away from the best and to chase something that looks like it is worth a lot but is worth almost nothing. I really can’t grasp it yet it is happening and i am scare that i might end up like that. My relationship with God isn’t exactly very consistent, stable or strong.

Then i came across Kenneth post about King Solomon. I read Ecclesiastes before and like how Kenneth summarize it, everything is meaningless without God in the picture. How can King Solomon who have so much wisdom and have experienced God in such a real way can fall away from God? And because he did, it scares me even more..

Enlistment

Sooooo i am heading into camp tmr morning. I am scare, excited and okay with army. Scare because i am entering an unfamiliar environment and a unfamiliar culture. Excited because it is a new and will be an interesting experience. Okay because it’s just 2 and a half weeks. Ohhh all the mixed emotions..

Its 12 now. I should go sleep. See you guys! Please keep me in prayer, thanks!(:

Really Really Encouraged!

I never really thought through when i decide to wear the wig and play ‘that role’. Honestly, i want to just wipe everybody’s mind and live like today’s emcee-ing didn’t happen. Embarrass i guess. But i am very encouraged to see people commenting and (Y) this post. I can’t take the credit though.. Because during the practice, my mind went blank as soon as i was on stage. So the fact that i was even able to say a single sentence during the actual service was all God. I prayed super duper extremely hard before the service started. YongJian was a really good co-emcee and friend. I think we are able to bounce nonsense off each other quite well and he was calming me down while encouraging me throughout the entire service. I think it’s hard to do that because i am sure he was nervous too.

I met Darryl at Redhill this morning, so we walked to church together. As we walked and chat, we started talking about Daniel and James (they are sec 2, same as Darryl). And i found out that Darryl was the one who got Daniel to come for cell, who in turn got James to come, who then manage to make WeiYang feel comfortable in cell! Daniel and James only comes for youth service because their parents come for 11.15 service. On the week that we did the commitment card, Darryl seize the opportunity to get Daniel to come for cell. Which in turn got James to come. And it’s not easy for D&J because this means that they have to come on their own and they have to wake up early. To see that they come for cell regularly now, really makes me all *WOOOO!~* inside. And i am really proud to see Darryl stepping up and out during this 40DOC. God is truly doing a work in R-AGE!(:

Truly Transformed

Once again, its 10 million years since i blogged. There is something that i have been wanting to blog for some time now.. and i guess now is the time..

So i was in Transformers last year, taking a group of sec ones. At the start of the year, kenneth ask each of the CMs to think of what they want to see in their kids at the end of the year. For me, i always felt that having friends in church is important. Without friends, it is really hard to stay in church. There is no motivation, you feel lonely. It’s really horrible. So i believe that with friends, you will be more grounded in church. I mean it shouldn’t just be about having friends but i am sure you get my point. It’s easy to fall away from church without friends..

By the end of the year, i saw that they were quite tight with one another and i was really glad to see that. But i know that going to sec2 means that they will be splitting up and i was really afraid that many will just stop coming. Then about a month ago, when i stepped into one of the classroom for cell i saw like 6 to 8 sec2s! And that is only my region! Some kids who just come for service actually came for cell. And till this week, they have been coming! I checked footsteps (quite a number of boys went to that cell) and majority comes for cell and service. To see that many of them are able to find a cell/region where they feel belong, it really makes me happy. God is amazing. Like i could never imagine this. What little faith right? But yea, i am in awe of what God can do.

P.S i think my english is dying.. I can’t seem to think of words to use or how to form proper sentences.

P.P.S going in army on 7sept..